Meet bisexuals in Olsztyn TODAY and connect with hundreds of thousands of singles like you now!(As a Silicon Valley firm, we have been in the online dating business for over 16 years!Here’s what they had to say: Rob (not his real name) is 46-years-old.He lives in San Jose, CA and has been married to his wife for 12 years.
Some of my initial suppositions included internalized homophobia, fear of community and family rejection, and concerns over physical safety.
The straight men have no homophobia at all – to the point where they’re willing to seek counseling from me, an openly gay therapist. Who does the man want to go to dinner and a show with, who does he want to spend the holidays with, who does he want to wake up next to in the morning? What are the psychological underpinnings for this behavior?
A lot of times the gay men never even make it to me (without prompting from their wife, anyway) because they’re riddled with homophobia and I’m too gay for them. So if a client is struggling with his sexual orientation and he’s got a lot of homophobia, he’s probably gay. A gay guy wants to do all of that with a man, a bisexual guy might want a man or a woman, and the straight guy wants to only be with a woman in that way. And does that differ depending on the man’s true sexual orientation? The gay man is doing this because it’s his sexual identity.
I went on to date a number of trans guys, and in my mind, “bi” was also indicative of a gender binary I didn’t believe existed.
I’ve since come to understand that actually, the “bi” implies attraction not to two genders, but to members of both one’s own and other genders, and that the bisexual umbrella includes a wide rainbow of labels connoting sexual fluidity. Given all that struggle and growth, my current situation might come as a surprise: I’m in a committed, long-term relationship with a cisgender man who identifies as straight—just like a startling majority of other bisexual women.